Loving You
by Eloda
Summary: They both struggle with their emotion. One from hiding it, the other from showing it. Yuki couldn't take it anymore, he just needed to hear the three words from Luka's lips to know that Luka feels the same way about him. Lemon. Now beta-ed! Enjoy.


Disclaimer: If it does belong to me, I would have made Luka ravish Yuki in every single episode. So nope. Never mine. Never will be. Sob!

Do read the author's note won't you? (It's at the bottom of the page. XD)

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**Loving You**

"Yuki." Luka sighed softly before turning away from the cold November night, and into the warmth of the welcoming fireplace. It has been a month since Yuki has arrived at the Twilight Mansion and no, she –

The raven haired man's pale ebony hand stopped at the shiny golden door knob.

He still didn't remember anything about them.

"Yuki." Luka sighed again and watch as the cold night frosted his breath. Nothing could compare to what he was feeling at the moment.. It was almost as if-

_As if I lost him._

It's killing Luka. The pain ebbed away at the corners of his heart.

_It hurts. It hurts so fucking god damned much._

Luka rested his head onto the cool glass door.

"Yuki. Yuki. Yuki." He whispered ever so softly to himself. Chanting his love's name as if it was his mantra. His saving grace. His light. His everything.

_Why?_

Luka slowly slumped down, back against the glass door, all strength in him gone.

_Why steal my heart away and leave me feeling hollow and empty?Why don't you see?_

"Luka?"

Luka opened his eyes. Yuki was squatting down next to him, worries written all over his face, his eyes.

"Are you hurting anywhere? Do you feel sick?"

Luka regarded the creamy orange haired boy silently. Taking in his sharp, defined face. The soft emerald eyes. The pink, pale lips. Nothing has changed. It's still the same Yuki, just without the memories. Without a clue.

Out of an impulse. Luka extended his face and caressed Yuki's side of face. Yuki's eyes widened a fraction.

"Lu-Luka?"

"Just for a while. Just a while."

_Do you realize it?_

Yuki closed his eyes. The feeling of Luka, near him, with him, it feels…

_So right. So perfect. So… So… warm._

A thumb over the forbidden soft lips lightly. The owner gave a small, sad smile.

_Do you remember?_

The eyelids fluttered open to reveal a slightly dazzled pair of eyes.

_I love you_.

Luka stood up as the hand retreated. The silver eyes shielded of all emotions. Protected. Locked away.

"You shouldn't be outside for too long. You'll catch a cold."

With that said, he walked into the brightly lit mansion. The black coat flapped alongside his graceful movements, even in the absence of the chilly wind. No. He didn't look back. No. He didn't see the glistering tears at the corner of the smaller boy's eyes. No. He didn't stop.

"Luka." A soft whisper fell from Yuki's lips. The sound so soft that it could hardly be heard, but the silent night amplified every single noise. Every single whisper.

The steady footsteps halted momentarily. Yuki's eyes widen. Has Luka heard him?

The sound of the footsteps told Yuki otherwise.

The chilly frost bit into Yuki's heart. He felt as though he was tearing apart from the inside, watching Luka's retreating back, watching Luka leave him. Leave him? To where? Where else could Luka go? Inside the mansion? Leave him and went inside the mansion? Yuki shook his head in frustration. He just doesn't understand. Doesn't know. Where did all these… these things come from? Why the sadness when he watch Luka leave? Why the need to be by his side? Why? Why?

_Why do I want to be in his arms so much? Why do I want him to stay by my side?_

He could not find the answer.

_Is this…_

He just could not place his finger onto it. Every time the answer seem so close, every time when he was about to recall, he just, couldn't.

Yuki let out a groan of frustration. What is happening to him?

_Luka__._

Yuki screwed his eyes shut tightly. Hoping to shut his brain off. Block out these noises.

_Luka._

The metallic taste in his mouth told him he had bitten his lips so hard they were bleeding. He didn't release the injured lip. He needed to find a way to escape, find a way to get an answer.

_Luka__._

Just, just find some way to stop the swelling of his heart. He just wanted to find a way to make his heart stop.

_Luka._

What have you done to me?

He wobbled slightly. The frost's biting chill dulled to a numbness that spread through his body. He couldn't move. The limbs felt so light, just like they didn't exist at all. The world seem to be spinning. His vision was getting hazy. Cold beads of perspiration broke out on his forehead. He gave a satisfied smile.

_At least when I'm unconscious, I'll be oblivious to everything._

"Yuki."

The voice is so calming, so very nice.

"Yuki!"

_Kami, if you can hear me, please, just please, let me dream of Luka tonight._

Warm arms embraced the half conscious boy. "Yuki! Can you heard me?"

_Let me dream of him and me, together._

"Doctor!"

_I want to see him._

Yuki opened his eyes. He was in his room. Alone. He sighed and sat up. Even Sodom is not here. How did he get back into his room? The last thing he remembered before he fell asleep was…

"Are you awake?"

The voice jarred him from his thoughts.

"Luka…"

"How do you feel?"

Yuki stared at the silver eyes. This feeling…

_It's consuming me…_

"What's wrong?"

Yuki shook a negative. The signal, nothing, was clearly read.

"Can you walk?"

He nodded.

_Luka…_

Luka frowned slightly in concern before walking away. Yuki has to change his clothes in private after all, no matter if he is a boy or a girl.

"I love you."

Luka halted, eyes turned slightly and stared at Yuki, head bent, still on the bed. Did he imagine that?

He chuckled inwardly and reach for the door.

_I must be getting desperate._

"Luka!" Yuki screamed.

Luka turned around.

"Yu-"

A pair of soft lips covered his.

Yuki wrapped his hands around Luka's neck, eyes closed to hide his embarrassment. Yet, Luka seem stone cold, for there was no reaction from him at all.

Yuki's hand dropped to his side as he broke off the lips contact. His eyes still closed. This time to stop the tears threatening to fall from this rejection.

_Luka…_

Yuki bit his lips and turned around, planning to run to the bathroom. He'll cry there, when Luka leaves him alone once more.

_He don't feel the same way as I do._

All of a sudden, Yuki felt his right arm being yanked back roughly. Unable to balance with the sudden change in momentum, he fell.

Straight into Luka's chest.

Yuki blushed.

"I-I'm sorry." He pushed himself off Luka's chest, even with his protesting body is screaming otherwise.

"Yuki, look at me." The cool voice drifted near his right ear.

"I know how you feel Luka. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I know. I'm so sorry. I-"

"Open your eyes Yuki."

He did as bid, only to reveal the two beautiful glistering emerald eyes…

And felt a familiar soft lips place themselves over his.

The soft warm lips, pressing against his, nibbling, seeking. He felt Luka take his fair skinned hair and placing them at the his neck. Yuki wrapped his hands around Luka instinctively and shut his eyes when he felt Luka circled his waist.

_Please. Don't let this be a dream._

A playful tongue caress the soft lips, silently asking for entrance. Yuki opened his obediently. The warm tongue proceeded onto trace the cavern. Yuki gasped as he felt Luka suck on his tongue slightly. The two began a battle, pushing, licking, until Luka dominated him, his mind, his soul, his body.

They broke apart. The string of saliva broke as Yuki tilted his head to the side, gasping for air. He moaned as Luka went ahead to attack the vulnerable neck. The hot mouth stopped on a patch of skin between the neck and shoulder, and sucked hard.

Yuki gasped. "Luka… Ah!" Luka leaned back slightly, pleased at the newly made hickey on Yuki. He flickered Yuki's earlobe with his wet tongue, pleased at the small noises Yuki made. He slipped his left hand under Yuki's green T-shirt, feeling the smooth stomach, the slightly curved sides and finally, the hard erected nipples. Yuki gasped as he felt fingers ghosting over his nipples. He grabbed Luka's shoulders, in fear that the jelly like feeling in his legs meant that collapsing would soon be inevitable.

Luka smirked. "Excited?" Yuki blushed. He tried to close his eyes and turn away, only to be stopped by Luka as grasped his chin gently and kissed him again. The fingers never stop teasing Yuki's abused nipples. With his free hand, Luka moved south, the bulge in the pajama pants evident. Yuki's eyes flew open in shock and pleasure as Luka grabbed him through the pants. "Lu-Luka." Yuki moaned as the heat seeped through the thin fabric. He wasn't even wearing any undergarments.

Luka pulled down the pants slowly, taking in the lustful expression on Yuki. Yuki moaned again as Luka grabbed his groin. This is too much. He almost screamed in ecstasy when Luka swiped his finger over the slit. Oh Kami, this felt so good.

"Do you like this?" Luka whispered in his ear. Yuki nodded, he couldn't even manage a word without moaning or groaning. "Tell me Yuki. Let me hear your voice." Luka licked the inside of Yuki's ear, grinning when he felt Yuki's shudder. "Y- Ah! Yes!" Luka pumped the organ in his hand, and pinched the right nipple. Smiling, Luka reveled in the satisfaction that he was the only one who could make Yuki moan wantonly like this.

"Luka, wait." Luka stopped all motions. Stunned. Had he gone ahead of himself and went too far? Did he went too fast? Was Yuki against all this?

"Let me help you too. It's not fair that only I enjoy this." Yuki blushed and stammered, suddenly finding the floor very fascinating. Without waiting for a reply, Yuki kneeled and his fingers traced the zipper. He chewed his lips, as if debating for a moment before pulling down the zipper slowly, unknowingly torturing Luka. He pulled the pants down, only gasping in shock as he took a look at what was presented right in front of him. Luka was… huge.

Yuki gulped. He flicked his tongue ever so lightly over the redden head. Luka restrained a moan. Yuki grabbed Luka with his right hand and ran it up and down the length a few times experimentally. Hearing a soft moan, Yuki got bolder and leaned forward, taking the tip of the length into his mouth and sucked. He took in more of the length slowly, and stopped only when his gag reflex kicked in. The tongue licked the underside of the length unconsciously. Luka groaned in the extreme pleasure. Hands wandered onto the creamy orange head and caressed the soft hair. Groans turned into harsh panting as Yuki bobbed his head up and down the length, tasting the precum on his tongue. Luka's hand left the soft hair to steady himself against the wall nearby.

"Stop."

Yuki looked up, wondering what he has done wrong. Was his first blowjob that bad? Luka saw the uncertainty in the emerald eyes and smiled reassuringly. "You were great, but I can't wait any longer." Luka kissed him.

"I need you Yuki."

Yuki blushed. "I can't wait either." Luka guided Yuki onto the soft bed. Stripping Yuki of his remaining green top an unclothing himself, Luka laid Yuki down as he straddled him. Yuki's hands were splayed out beside him and he felt Luka intertwine their fingers together. He looked into Luka's silver eyes, which is filled with passion, love and lust right now, mirroring his own. He felt Luka grind his length against him, both groaning at the contact as the dripping precum ran over their lengths, bringing their pleasure to another height. Luka licked a dusky nipple, flickering his tongue over it and sucking while his other hand played with the other one. Yuki tossed his head to the side. "Ah. Luka…" he moaned. Delighted with the response, Luka decided to get on with the show.

"Are you sure Yuki?" Luka asked, his voiced seem to have gone husky with desire.

"Please Luka. I need you." Yuki leaned forward, kissing Luka with full force on the lips. No more words were needed. His answer was crystal clear.

_I love you Luka._

Luka pushed three fingers onto Yuki's mouth.

Purely based on instinct alone, Yuki took the fingers into his mouth and ran his tongue over them, coating them with saliva in the absence of lubricant. Luka took the fingers out of Yuki's mouth, his throat had gone dry from seeing the lust filled eyes, from feeling the tongue licking sensually over the fingers.

"It will hurt, but I'll try to make it as comfortable as possible, ok?" Luka pressed his forefinger against the quivering tight ring of muscle and thrust his finger inside slowly.

"Ah!" Yuki cried in pain as one more finger was thrust inside of him. "Ngh." He clasp his hands over his mouth as the fingers began a scissoring motion. It hurt.

"It'll feel better in a while." Luka's fingers curled his fingers slightly, probing the inner walls, searching for the small bundle of nerves that he knew would drive Yuki wild. "Mmmmgh." Yuki's eyes shot up. What was that?

A devilish smirk formed on Luka's lips. He pressed his fingers against the spot they had just passed and elicited a loud moan from the other. "Ohhh." Luka added a third finger, gracing his fingers against the spot again. "Luka! Hurry."

Luka removed his fingers, planting a kiss on Yuki's swollen lips before lining himself up with the slightly stretched entrance, pressing the head of his cock against the twitching hole. "I love you Yuki." He pushed himself inside slowly, inch by inch, groaning as he was finally engulfed in his lover's heat.

Yuki tensed from the pain, only making it more worse. "Yuki, relax."

"I know," Yuki panted. Relaxing would be a lot easier if it didn't feel like he was being split in half! Oh, gods, Luka felt so big, so hot…

"Does this help?" Yuki's breath caught as he felt something warm encircle his shaft and start pumping gently. He moaned. Yes, actually. It did help. The warm hands on him felt so good and-

Oh… Despite the pain, he felt so good…

"Luka." He moaned, feeling his eyes water from happiness. He finally felt complete, the black hole inside him was now filled by Luka's love. He couldn't ask for more. He felt a warm hand on his checks.

"I'm sorry. Does it hurt?"

Yuki shook his head. "Don't stop." He pleaded. The answer only made him smile, "Never plan to. Not now Yuki, not ever." As if to emphasize his points, Luka thrust deeper into the boy.

A gasp filled the room and Luka smiled. Ah, the prostate. Luka pulled back slightly and thrust in again, hitting the right spot. "Ah!" Yuki wrapped his legs around Luka's torso, giving him a better access. "Harder."

Luka smirked, "At your command, master." He thrust deeper, he pull out each time only to thrust it in harder, deeper, pushing his meaty head against the bundle of nerves that made Yuki see stars. His pace increased, his body quivered in anticipation as heat began pooling steadily at the bottom of his stomach. From Yuki's incoherent screams, he seem to be ending soon too. Luka wrapped his hands around Yuki's shaft, pumping it in motion of his thrust.

"LUKA!" Yuki screamed and released, his semen spilling over both their naked, sweaty torsos. Luka grunted as Yuki tightened around him, which was more than enough to bring him to his peak. "Nmmn." He gave a final thrust and released, filling Yuki deep with his seeds

The two bodies collapsed onto the bed. Both exhausted from their love making. Luka rolled onto his side to avoid crushing Yuki under his weight. The two lovers stared deep into each others eye. Without breaking eye contact, Yuki pushed his upper body up with his arms and leaned over Luka.

He stared straight into the captivating silver eyes and whispered, "I love you, Luka."

Luka wrapped his hands around Yuki and pressed him closer. "I love you too, Yuki. Forever and always. I love you."

Yuki smiled, his heart melting at Luka's sweet words. "Take me to paradise Luka."

Luka smirked, "Couldn't ask for better." He said and pressed their lips together.

_Do you know? I can't ask for anything better than you. You are my everything._

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Author's note:

Well, this is my very first yaoi. XD I just love Luka x Yuki. XD I was so nervous about writing this… hope it didn't turn out too bad. I hope I can get feedback on whether you are satisfied or not. HoHoHo! Review and join the dark side! MUWHAHAHAHA! XD Until next time.

P.S. Yes dear readers, this story is now beta-ed! Phew! YEA! All thanks to my lovely beta Maiden of Books! XD Cookies for her~


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